|
I'm a Loser Bitch... I cried myself to sleep last night. I know, what a way to start off an entry. But it's true. I cried. All the way until I fell asleep. I cried because I don't think I'll ever get an El Camino, much less a car. I cried because I'm so close to failing geometry, and my mom and dad will kill me. I cried because Nicole is cutting and depressed, just like I was, and that depresses ME, because she doesn't deserve that. I cried because only one person here knows about me being bi, and that's probably the only person that would treat me the same. I cried because I think I like Nicole, and she doesn't seem interested. I cried because I still want Jesse, and I'll never have him. I cried because I was horny again. I cried because school's almost out, so I won't get to see most of my friends until next school year. I cried because my mom might be losing her job. I cried because I thought again about how I won't be able to get a car. I cried because I don't think I'll ever be able to find an El Camino. I cried because it hadn't stormed, and I love storms. I cried because I want romance. I cried because I act all tough, but I really want a guy or girl to take me out one night and just lay under the stars, or dance in the rain together. I cried because I think I'm ugly and no one will ever want me. And I cried because I was being stupid and crying over nothing. So I cried myself to sleep once again, and yet I'm still sad, and I'll probably cry myself to sleep again tonight. Well, I'm off...Brother is bugging me...write more tomorrow...time to go bawl... |